Thursday, February 5, 2015

We're Having A ......

So yesterday was the day. I mean THE DAY.  The day that we get to start buying gender specific clothes and stop referring to my ever expanding waistline as an "it."  My doctor is awesome and does an ultrasound at every appointment because, "it's more fun for you to get to see a picture of the baby instead of just hear the heartbeat."  So that's fun!  We decided to take Marie with us to our appointment.  Marie wanted a brother.  From the time we told her she was going to be a big sister it as always been "how's the baby brother doing?"  Not "whatever God gives us..." a brother. I tried to combat this by always referring to the baby as a girl, but she would just correct me.  "No, no, no....baby BROTHER, Mama."

To be honest, I was hoping for a boy as well, just because one of my biggest concerns with adding a little one to the family is the comparisons that people will make between this one and Marie (mostly in Sierra Leone).  I thought there would be fewer comparisons with a boy.

The good ole' doc put the ultrasound on my tummy and we waited.  I was preparing myself for Marie's reaction when he said, "Well, that's pretty easy! B.O.Y." I watched Marie as she was trying to figure out what that meant when he said, "That means, little one that you are having a baby brother!"  She was excited. To say the least.  It was really fun to watch her get so excited about the baby. :)  She insisted on taking the ultrasound pictures with her to school.

He kind of looks like an alien
After the big gender reveal the doctor did some more looking around and then said, "Well, basically if you gave birth right now neither you or your baby would make it."  Wait. What? This jolted me out "baby boy revelry" and I was back in the room.  Basically, the ultrasound showed that my placenta is completely covering my cervix so if Baby decided to come now, he'd have nowhere to go because my placenta is covering his exit route.

Now I've seen this before.  Plenty of times, unfortunately.  In Sierra Leone, when our only ultrasound machine broke, part of the reason it was so utterly frustrating was because when a woman came to the hospital and she was bleeding, I had no way of knowing why.

In that moment when he told me, I had zero fear.  My two emotions were thankfulness and grief.  I was so thankful for the incredible medical technology we have that allowed us to see this so clearly, so early, and allow for so much advanced planning if necessary!!  My thankfulness was mixed with grief as I immediately remembered the scores of women in Sierra Leone who give birth with NONE of the things that I have access to.  It's just so unfair!  Praying for my fellow Sierra Leonean mama's who "get belle!"

I decided that the way we'd tell my family is to bake a cake, either blue or pink and have Marie cut the cake and spill the beans.  I was SO careful when putting the food coloring in so that I wouldn't accidentally get any on my face or fingers that would give it away before the big cut!!  Unfortunately when it came time to frost the cake every time I put some frosting on it would just pull part of the top of the cake off and mix with the frosting.  The more I put on, the worse it got.  Also, it looks green.  This is the cake BEFORE we cut into it.  Not a big secret......


Incidentally I hadn't been able to keep it from my mom and sister so.....the reveal cake was mostly because I was so proud of Marie for being able to keep a secret. We pretended that nobody knew.  Oops. 

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