Thursday, April 7, 2011

Thinking....

Well, I haven't blogged in a while! It hasn't really been for a lack of things I've been doing....but more of a lack of interesting things. I mean, don't get me wrong, I know that going to government buildings to drop off letters requesting letters to take to more government buildings to get more letters sounds fascinating...but I just haven't been able to find the right way to spin it. (Granted, I will admit it sounds like the perfect opportunity for some good blogging material what with my natural social awkwardness and propensity for falling down.....all against the background of government officials...but alas, nothing yet). So, in the midst of carrying letters to and fro, I usually have some waiting time....which means some good thinking time. So I've been thinking a lot in the last couple of weeks. And I've been kind of alarmed at how much I've been thinking about home. I've been here for about 2 1/2 months now. Up to this point, while I've missed my family, I've been so busy and just getting used to things that I haven't really had time to be homesick. But the last couple of weeks I've had some more downtime and have noticed where my thoughts tend to go. I attribute it to a few things. One, the "honeymoon" is starting to wear off a bit. For example, when I first arrived and decided to do some of my own laundry I thought "wow, this is cool!" Now I tend to think "man, this is kind of hard work and it's hot! Was that sweat that just rolled off my nose? Is this really even clean? Man, this sure would be easier with some sort of machine that washed and dried these clothes....wait a second I had one of those!" Other things like, "Man, another mosquito bite? Hope that one wasn't The One to give me malaria" and "I remember that one time (every night for the first 29 years of my life) when I slept in a room that didn't have bugs and rodents attacking me all night while I slept." You know, things like that. Also, my family's circumstances are changing with my parents moving and my sister being prego with her first ego (my first niece!) and it's weird that things are changing without me. I thought I made it clear when I left that I was allowed to leave and have an adventure but they were supposed to stay exactly the same! Don't think they got that message..... Anyway, along with my thoughts of home have been thoughts about my thoughts of home. See, I'm not surprised at all my my twinge of homesickness. I fully expected it and was actually expecting it to come sooner. My dilemma is what to do about it. I absolutely know that I can't live my life here in Sierra Leone constantly thinking and wishing for home. So my thoughts recently have been how to balance my natural affinity for home (especially my family and friends.....ok and Subway) with the fact that I am sure this is where God wants me right now. Hmmm..... Anyway, I'm confident that Jesus and I can get this worked out. It's just giving my brain something to chew on while I wait....and wait..... :)

1 comment:

  1. I thought we talked about the "prego with her first ego" comment. It's weird. But I still love you. :0)

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